Hey Everyone! I'm back home since a week now and wanted to tell you a bit about my short but lovely time in Berlin and my hometown Rostock. I just needed a few days off to get my head free and to break through my daily routine which drives me mad lately. I hope things will change soon before the situation changes me and fucks me up. Being lonely is wonderful but after times loneliness can kill you from inside, especially when you feel like trapped. I miss my friends and my family and it's something so much more important than any money, food or wealth in the world. I would give anything to have those people around me again, it's life and energy, that's what I have realized throughout these days.
I was in Berlin for two days what probably sounds not long to you but for me it is a big step as I am afraid to go out of my comfort zone. I think too much about things and get crazy and afraid, but luckily I have important people who give me confidence and saviety.
The weather was quite nice and we explored a few places in an area called Friedrichshain. One store that we went to was Co Exist. I saw that store on Instagram before and was excited to see it in reality finally. The clothes there remind me to one of my favorite movies Party Monster - crazy clothes, unique and everything apart from normality.
There was a small vintage market/outlet event around the corner. I have expected more and was a bit disappointed as the store was very small and there were too much people. I haven't found anything but it was worth a look. The cute stuff below is from another small store, cuteness overload ♥
Later we came across Cupcake Berlin, a small café that I went to with my sister and my mum already a few years ago. They are not completely vegan but always offer vegan cupcakes, hot beverages and cake. Thereafter Ohlala, a completely vegan café where I took a Pumpkin Spice Latte with me. Unfortunately I wasn't hungry at all but I'm gonna get me something sweet next time!
↑ This is so accurate, preach ↑
All in one we walked a lot but I love that feeling of being active whilst breathing the fresh air and exploring unknown places :)
On Thursday I took my bus to Rostock and spent my time with my dad in Warnemünde. It's actually the part directly at the Baltic Sea, an own part of the area as far as I know so I want to keep the name and don't count it to Rostock :) I enjoyed every single minute even if the weather was completely shit. Drizzle and freezing air but I took enough layers of clothes with me. I also robbed daddies mustard-colored scarf as one wasn't enough and a second lumberjack shirt that he gifted me ♥
We drove into the city and I bought a sweater and leggings at H&M for myself, followed by a quick visit at Vegangster, a completely vegan small restaurant that offers things like Döner and Burgers. I have it better in memory, was quite disappointed and left it blank.
In the evening completely drunk, okey honestly, not really ;D I'm not sure what was wrong but I guess only wine that was not a part of the game this time drives me crazy, not Sake or Jägermeister :D But at least I now know that wine causes bad hangovers. It was really funny though! You maybe have seen a few snaps on my Snapchat.
The other day I just walked alone through Warnemünde along the beach and the tiny alleys. I guess that's what I can do the best. Followed by another grey day by the water but with important talks with my friend and warming coffee later in a café.
I didn't took that much pictures, firstly because I had troubles with my phone battery and secondly because I wanted to enjoy the time without spending every single minute on my phone. The weather also causes grainy picture quality what I can't stand as perfectionist(I think you can relate).
All what I can do now is to hope for a change before I get buried in this black hole. Waiting day by day and praying each morning all over again.
But I believe in a miracle ♥
But I believe in a miracle ♥
Berlin ist wirklich eine schöne Stadt. Tolle Eindrücke :)
ReplyDeletewww.vivalavida-photography.blogspot.de
Ja das ist sie :3 Dankeschön ♥
DeleteI love your blog and you inspire me. I think you're amazing and I'm sure your dream of traveling will come true.
ReplyDeleteThis is so sweet of you, whoever you are, thanks so much <3
DeleteBeautiful photos, look as a good trip!
ReplyDeleteYes it was thank you!! ♥
DeleteFirst thing I want to say is, You're Amazing, and I understand the way you felt/feel, but know that eventually everything will happen the way you'd like it to. I just hope that you'll be able to do what you want soon and that you'll feel happy (and not lonely or lost or fucked up) for a 100%. You don't deserve to have these thoughts and/or to deal with what you're dealing with now, but as I said before everything will be fine and Idk when, but you I'm sure it's going to happen in the near future. Stay strong, as you are and stay safe. I wish you all the best x
ReplyDeleteThere's always this 'eventually' and I don't want to sit here another two years, having this eventually in my mind.. Life is too short to be useless when there's so much power and strength in my heart. Nobody deserves to have these thoughts, neither me, the people out there, nor you. Maybe it is just because I'm a very inpatient person which makes situations like the one which I am in right now even harder. I hate waiting, seeing how everyone else lives their own life and dreams and I just can't reach my own ones. I will try harder and harder till I fall or fly.
DeleteBtw I'm thinking about you a lot lately x Much love to you and thank you for being here ♥
Kimi, I know exactly what you mean, and I agree with you. But if you try to believe that things will get better, things will begin to be better even sooner. And you'll fly, maybe also fall, but that will only make you stronger and before you even think about it, you're living your dream life. Of course it's easy to say, hard to actually happen irl, but it will and it will soon. Just stay you and have fun, don't push yourself too hard, you deserve to relax some time. - Btw, really?? Why? But yeah, same goes for you. x Lots of love for you too and of course.
ReplyDeleteWas du brauchst ist ein Plan. Was reales, keine überteuerte Modeschule, irgendn 0815-Job, whatever. Du hast hohe Ansprüche und sowas ist naturgemäß schwieriger zu erreichen. Ich kenn dich und deine Lebenssituation nicht ins kleinste Detail und könnte mir ein Urteil darüber bilden, aber ich kann dir bloß aus eigener Erfahrung sagen, dass es, wenn du feststeckst, nie verkehrt ist sich Hilfe zu suchen. Bevor ein paar grundlegende Sachen professionell abgeklärt sind, ist man manchmal gar nicht in der Lage aus der neugewonnenen Freiheit als "Erwachsener" :') irgendwas konstruktives, langfristiges zu erschaffen. Und das ist okay. Wir haben unsere besondere Geschichte die uns geprägt hat und uns manchmal etwas dysfunktional, aber vor allem besonders gemacht hat. Mach dir einen Plan.
ReplyDeleteGanz viel Kraft und positive Energie an dich! <3